Wednesday, July 16, 2014

This won't end well

for one of us, Human! 

**Note from Ms. Stella O'Houligan **
Who grabs a perfectly healthy, snoozin wee old kitty from her spot on the carpet 
where she was snoozin
and she's OLD
and did I mention the snoozin part? 
And unceremoniously crams her in a carrier without so much as a by-your-leave Captain? 
And next thing you know... We're in 
The Car!!!
"Oh Stella stop being so dramatic!  You beat up everyone so I think playing the age card is a bit much even for you."

(I can't see my house from here)

Where's my Doctor?  I'm totally reporting you to the animal welfare people!

"Oh Ms. Stella, Dr. Horn will be in, in a minute, just keep your furrs on!"


**Note from That Woman**

Ms. Stella was treated to an office visit for her general physical, blood work & nail trim. (I usually do the nail trimming myself but Dr. Horn suggested it since they would be attempting to look inside her mouth and she's not very fond of that... 

______IS IT MY TURN YET?_____
no Ms. Stella, give me a second!

...After I tried to restrain her for the dental look which didn't work; Dr. called in reinforcements.  They had no better luck (for which I was oddly proud and validated that my own restraining technique wasn't lame). 

Doctor says he will call with lab results and based on those will see what needs to happen with her teeth.  I suggested rubbing some of that stuff they gave Ollie in her ear to calm her down but he felt it was unnecessary and didn't want to *stress her more than needed just yet... 

_____STRESS ME MORE?? WHO IS HE KIDDING? 
YOU WANNA SEE STRESS?_____
Ms. Stella, for pity's sake, wait your turn!

...I can tell he really loves Ms. Stella as no matter how long it's been he knows that trying to listen to her heart is useless over her purring so he just smiles at her doesn't even try, he just gives her a gentle hug and takes her pulse that way.  

She had only lost a few ounces of weight since her visit a year ago so that's not worrisome ..

_____ARE YOU DONE YET?  MY CAT FURRIENDS DON'T WANT TO READ ALL YOUR INANE BABBLE, THERE'S BIRDS TO HUNT, OTHER CATS TO WHAP_____
Ms Stella Please! I'm nearly done!

...She was really fine on the way to the Doctor's in car as I kept my hand inside the carrier and just kept petting her and chatting to her, we were nearly home...

_____TIME'S UP!  IT'S MY TURN, IT'S MY BLOG; NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR SIDE OF THE STORY_____

So kitties; what happened next was EPIC!  I got all Exorcist on her (leg; car seat, carrier) 
and she was all 'oh Ms. Stella this, and Oh Ms. Stella that, and I was all 
BBBLLALLAHHHAahaaghghghghghghgh!!!  
MUUUHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!!!!


***
Note from Ms. Stella to 'That Insufferable Woman' 

I hope you are happy with yourself! 
Not only were you late back for work; you had to change clothes as well,
and clean up cat barfs from the Container of Death; the car seat, the kitchen counter, the kitchen floor AND two different rooms of carpet.


So 

Rock! 

We'll keep ya posted kitties on lab tests
right now I need a lie down


14 comments:

  1. You poor sweet ladycat. Maybe it was all just a bad dream.

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  2. Yep, that was epic! We hope the blood they stole comes back with good news.

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  3. Good job Ms Stella. btw do you know that woman called you an old bat? Just sayin' mol

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  4. Ms. Stella, you still got spunk!

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  5. That certainly sounds epic. We're sure that everybody at the vet and that woman won't forget the experience for some time to come.

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  6. MOL, you sure are a feisty gal!

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  7. That. Was. EPIC!!!! Well, uh, the hurling at the end. The V-E-T stuff kinda DIDN'T.
    ~ we three

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  8. I hope your lab tests turn out well, Stella - and GREAT job!

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  9. Good Lord, it sounds like a horror movie. I hope you have had some rest, Stella. Sending a hug, Deb
    btw...Audrey says YOU are her hero. ;-)

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  10. Yes, Ms. Stella, you totally ROCK!

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  11. We were sure glad we all peed before we read this 'cause we were all laughing so hard we would have wet ourselves! Way to go...Ms. Stella. You are right, you do rock! Will it help the inexcusableness of what your mom did if we tell you we have nominated you for an award. You can stop by our blog to pick it up. XO, Lily Olivia, Mauricio, Misty May, Giulietta, Fiona, Astrid, Lisbeth and Calista Jo

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  12. I am proud of you Ms Stella! I hope your results come back good.

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  13. No one tells a story quite as well as you do, Ms. Stella. Our human doesn't even want to imagine EPIC cat barf in a vehicle....

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